Disfellowshipping: The Watchtower Society Tightens Its Control

July 20th, 2002 | Posted in: , Doctrine & Changes | Keywords: , , , | 33 Comments



The leadership of the Jehovah’s Witnesses has the difficult task to find a balance between the wish to be seen as a ‘mainstream’ religion and their sectarian dogmas like Disfellowshipping and the refusal of blood transfusions.

In the last decade the Office of Public Information of Jehovah’s Witnesses has worked hard to give the Jehovah’s Witnesses a more friendlier and mainstream appearance. The recent media attention regarding the handling of sexual abuse among its members is seen by the leadership as an attack on God’s people. It seems that this causes a more isolationist policy towards the outside world. This might be the reason why the Watchtower Society is again taking a hard line on Disfellowshipped and Disassociated members.

Very interesting is how the Society changed the text on the Authorized Site of the Office of Public Information of Jehovah’s Witnesses, jw-media.org, in the Beliefs-Frequently Asked Questions section. Below are two screenshots taken from this website. One is taken before July 2002 the other in July 2002:

before
Screenshot taken before July 2002

after
Screenshot taken July 2002

It is very clear that “Quit mixing with them” is a much harder standpoint than “Disfellowshipping does not sever family ties”. I know that there are cases of more informed Jehovah’s Witnesses who justified their association with Disfellowshipped family members by quoting the jw-media.org website: “Disfellowshipping does not sever family ties”. But this time of Perestroika has come to an end.

To make this hardened standpoint clear for all its members, the “Faithful and Discreet Slave” has prepared an article that will be discussed in congregations all over the world. The article is published in Our Kingdom Ministry of August 2002. You can read it below:

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Display Christian Loyalty When a Relative is Disfellowshipped

1. The bond between family members can be very strong. This brings a test upon a Christian when a marriage mate, a child, a parent, or another close relative is disfellowshipped or has disassociated himself from the congregation. (Matt. 10:37) How should loyal Christians treat such a relative? Does it make a difference if the person lives in your household? First, let us review what the Bible says on this subject, the principles of which apply equally to those who are disfellowshipped and to those who disassociate themselves.

2. How to Treat Expelled Ones: God’s Word commands Christians not to keep company or fellowship with a person who has been expelled from the congregation: “Quit mixing in company with anyone called a brother that is a fornicator or a greedy person’ or an idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner, not even eating with such a man…. Remove the wicked man from among yourselves.” (1 Cor. 5:11, 13) Jesus’ words recorded at Matthew 18:17 also bear on the matter: “Let (the expelled one] be to you just as a man of the nations and as a tax collector.” Jesus’ hearers well knew that the Jews of that day had no fraternization with Gentiles and that they shunned tax collectors as outcasts. Jesus was thus instructing his followers not to associate with expelled ones - See The Watchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 18-20.

3. This means that loyal Christians do not have spiritual fellowship with anyone who has been expelled from the congregation. But more is involved. God’s Word states that we should ‘not even eat with such a man.’ (1 Cor. 5:11) Hence, we also avoid social fellowship with an expelled person. This would rule out joining him in a picnic, party, or trip to the shops or theatre or sitting down to a meal with him either in the home or at a restaurant.

4. What about speaking with a disfellowshipped person? While the Bible does not cover every possible situation, 2 John 10 helps us to get Jehovah’s view of matters: “If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, never receive him into your homes or say a greeting to him.” Commenting on this, The Watchtower of September 15,1981, page 25, says: “A simple ‘Hello’ to someone can be the first step that develops into a conversation and maybe even a friendship. Would we want to take that first step with a disfellowshiped person?”

5. Indeed, it is just as page 31 of the same issue of The Watchtower states: “The fact is that when a Christian gives himself over to sin and has to be disfellowshiped, he forfeits much: his approved standing with God;.. sweet fellowship with the brothers, including much of the association he had with Christian relatives.”

6. In the Immediate Household: Does this mean that Christians living in the same household with a disfellowshipped family member are to avoid talking to, eating with, and associating with that one as they go about their daily activities?’ The Watchtower of April 15, 1991, in the footnote on page 22, states: “‘If in a Christian’s household there is a disfellowshipped relative, that one would still be part of the normal, day-to-day household dealings and activities.” Thus, it would be left to members of the family to decide on the extent to which the disfellowshipped family member would be included when eating or engaging in other household activities. And yet, they would not want to give brothers with whom they associate the impression that everything is the same as it was before the disfellowshipping occurred.

7. However, The Watchtower of September 15, 1981, page 28, points out regarding the disfellowshipped or disassociated person: “Former spiritual ties have been completely severed. This is true even with respect to his relatives, including those within his immediate family circle. .
That will mean changes in the spiritual fellowship that may have existed in the home. For example, if the husband is disfellowshiped, his wife and children will not be comfortable with him conducting a family Bible study or leading in Bible reading and prayer. If he wants to say a prayer, such as at mealtime, he has a right to do so in his own home. But they can silently offer their own prayers to God. (Prov. 28:9; Ps. 119:145, 146) What if a disfellowshiped person in the home wants to be present when the family reads the Bible together or has a Bible study? The others might let him be present to listen if he will not try to teach them or share his religious ideas.

8. If a minor child living in the home is disfellowshipped, Christian parents are still responsible for his upbringing. The Watchtower of November 15, 1988, page 20, states: “Just as they will continue to provide him with food, clothing, and shelter, they need to instruct and discipline him in line with God’s Word. (Proverbs 6:20-22; 29:17) Loving parents may thus arrange to have a home Bible study with him, even if he is disfellowshipped. Maybe he will derive the most corrective benefit from their studying with him alone. Or they may decide that he can continue to share in the family study arrangement.”-See also The Watchtower of October f, 2001, pages 16-17.

9. Relatives Not in the Household: “The situation is different if the disfellowshipped or disassociated one is a relative living, outside the immediate family circle and home,” states The Watchtower of April 15, 1988, page 28. “It might be possible to have almost no contact at all with the relative. Even if there were some family matters requiring contact, this certainly would be kept to a minimum,” in harmony with the divine injunction to “quit mixing in company with anyone” who is guilty of sinning unrepentantly. (1 Cor. 5:11) Loyal Christians should strive to avoid needless association with such a relative, even keeping business dealings to an absolute minimum. - See also The Watchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 29-30.

10. The Watchtower addresses another situation that can arise: “What if a close relative, such as a son or a parent who does not live in the home, is disfellowshiped and subsequently wants to move back there? The family could decide what to do depending on the situation. For example, a disfellowshiped parent may be sick or no longer able to care for himself financially or physically. The Christian children have a Scriptural and moral obligation to assist. (1 Tim. 5:8)… What is done may depend on factors such as the parent’s true needs, his attitude and the regard the head of the household has for the spiritual welfare of the household.”-The Watchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 28-9.

11. As for a child, the same article continues: “Sometimes Christian parents have accepted back into the home for a time a disfellowshiped child who has become physically or emotionally ill. But in each case the parents can weigh the individual circumstances. Has a disfellowshiped son lived on his own, and is he now unable to do so? Or does he want to move back primarily because it would be an easier life? What about his morals and attitude? Will he bring ‘leaven’ into the home? - Gal. 5:9.”

12. Benefits of Being Loyal to Jehovah: Cooperating with the Scriptural arrangement to disfellowship and shun unrepentant wrongdoers is beneficial. It preserves the cleanness of the congregation and distinguishes us as upholders of the Bible’s high moral standards. (1 Pet. 1:14-16) It protects us from corrupting influences. (Gal. 5:7-9) It also affords the wrongdoer an opportunity to benefit fully from the discipline received, which can help him to produce “peaceable fruit, namely, righteousness.”-Heb. 12:11.

13. After hearing a talk at a circuit assembly, a brother and his fleshly sister realized that they needed to make adjustments in the way they treated their mother, who lived elsewhere and who had been disfellowshipped for six years. Immediately after the assembly, the man called his mother, and after assuring her of their love, he explained that they could no longer talk to her unless there were important family matters requiring contact. Shortly thereafter, his mother began attending meetings and was eventually reinstated. Also, her unbelieving husband began studying and in time was baptized.

14. Loyally upholding the disfellowshipping arrangement outlined in the Scriptures demonstrates our love for Jehovah and provides an answer to the one that is taunting Him. (Prov. 27:11) In turn, we can be assured of Jehovah’s blessing. King David wrote regarding Jehovah: “As for his statutes, I shall not turn aside from them. With someone loyal you will act in loyalty.”-2 Sam. 22:23, 26.

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The Disfellowshipping policy harms the hundreds of thousands of Disfellowshipped Jehovah’s Witnesses worldwide. It causes also unnecessary self-inflicted pain for Jehovah’s Witnesses who, against every natural feeling, shun their excommunicated family members and friends. The Jehovah’s Witnesses have still a long way to go to become mainstream believers.



33 Comments

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Comment by CaptiveStill (Comment ID: 344357)

I Often wonder how many people are in the same situation as me. I have been a witness for 18 years, and have had several privileges, I am currently active, yet I know deep inside there are many issues within the Org. I have seen the attitude of “Mother” to the point that it never apologizes for their wrong doings (You all know what I mean: UNO scandal, wrong Dates, etc, etc - too many to list) Often they keep blaming us for speculating too much, etc. I am completely aware of the injustice, power hungry elders, immorality, that goes on in the cong. But one can not do much. I personally don’t believe in the “Wait on Jehovah” because if that was the case, Jehovah would have acted against the slave for it’s own unrepentant wrong doings. Why am I still in, you may ask? The only reason is because my Family is IN, and I consider this a personal sacrifice to be with my family. Maybe One day we will all feel the same and get out, but in the meantime, I have to live with this screwed up thinking (Knowing this is not the truth but yet pretend it is) So, as I mentioned at the beginning, I wonder how many active witnesses are in the same situation as me. Many may say, that I was never a truthful witness, etc. But I would say they are wrong, I was a faithful witness but I simply Refuse to be lied to anymore, I am afraid I have lost confidence on the FDS, they seem to be lost in “How To Control” the flock rather than how to teach and Love. I admire and respect all of you who have leave, you’ve been brave and have taken the first step, and have suffered but are now free! – I could say more, and present proof of my points, but what’s the use! - Blessings to all!!



Posted on August 18, 2008 at 7:22 pm


Comment by Fri (Comment ID: 344561)

Captivestill, many other people are in the same situation as you. I thing the number is about 6 million and counting. The vast majority knows it is a lie but continue in no knowing afraid of coming out for one reason or another. I find it quite interesting when the kingdom hall gives you a job; you quickly go and call it a privilege. That is brainwash for sure. Yep if you are a Christian you should not be expecting much. If you find $100.00 on the street you quickly thank Jehovah for helping you, on the other hand if you break a leg you quickly thank Jehovah for the trials and tribulations as it will make you a stronger Christian. Certainly the WT has put a blanket over your head.
I was in and left all because of hypocrisy, I have never been reproved nor disfellwoshipped in my life. I came out about 6 years ago and never looked back. I really did not give a rat’s behind what other people or family thought about it. It is your life and you ought to start caring of what you want not others. It is not good for you to live your life pretending to be what you are not so as to please others.

It is all mind control, nothing else. It is your life and you must live the way you want. Whatever decisions (stay/leave) you make will have consequences. I left and that was the best thing I did. I never looked back.



Posted on August 20, 2008 at 12:19 pm

 

Comment by Anonymous (Comment ID: 354201)

Forget about what other people say about ‘doing this or doing that’. Or this is right and this is wrong. Just remember that the Bible will ALWAYS tell you the truth.
(I am a member of the S.D.A. church)



Posted on September 6, 2008 at 9:39 pm

 
 

Comment by Yovana (Comment ID: 325330)

For all those people still in the Watchtower organization you have no idea how much of a brainwashing, marketing filled, psychological bullying they do. There is no free will like they pretend it to be. They claim themselves to be the only religion on this earth to have devine approval from God, all they know is their little books, & magazines without those they could never handle the bible properly. Next time a witness comes to your door listen to their introductions then wait for the hook & bait phrase.If you present them with knowledge about their origins you’ll send them running from your home & they will write on their little visit sheets not to visit you again. The whole organization is a sham created by a guy who wasn’t happy with his own religion and then taken over by greedy, power hungry individuals who think they are approved by Jehovah AKA: Yahweh, to make rules or interpret them as they wish and then change doctrine and claim it’s the “light getting brighter & brighter.” God never changes. The organization is doing a lot of flip-flops like: United Nations membership, use of Johannes Greber spiritist translation, celebrated World Health day, offering literature for free to avoid paying taxes, adopting disfellowshipping even when it’s considered a pagan custom, no longer going by the generation 1914 for the end to come since the amount of partakers in the conmemoracion is rising instead of falling, not allowing their members to speak to apostate people, claiming the end would come & it didn’t which is false profetizing (Deut. 18:21,22), their excuse for all changes is new light according to (Prov. 4:18), they dispise the United Nations and all religions yet sold-out & became members. Do you think they told their followers, I sure didn’t hear that announcement. For countless years they discouraged going to college, any education, that would take them away from preaching and meetings, yet some of the GB had kids who went on to prestigious Universities. My own mother said why do you want to go to college for years when Armageddon is coming. All their meetings are set-up to market their beliefs see the happy faces as they come to your door with just a wonderful disposition, buyer beware they won’t tell you at the door you will never celebrate anything, you’ll have to stop talking to worldy family and friends and the only information you can look at is theirs.’ If you do anything that goes against their cherished warped beliefs you will be disfellowshipped, shunned by all friends & family. No one will talk to you you are marked with a big fat DF they have literature on how to deal or not deal with anything you name it, they got an answer for it (reasoning scriptures), the internet is the apostate tool for taking you away from the organization which they have a Watchtower in August that deals with staying away from apostacy. Everyone knows or has seen Jehovah’s Witnesses preaching maybe you have talked to them before, look up their origins ask them questions & if your up for the challenge discuss your doubts & questions just don’t drink the Kool-Aid it might sound like it tastes good, trust me this is one drink you’ll want to pass on. By the way I’m very well versed in their doctrines, teachings, behaviors and techniques cause I was one I no longer believe in them I had enough Kool-Aid thank you! I’m not DF but I chose to leave, that is my right & my salvation doesn’t depend on how many hours of preaching I do but only if I have faith in God my salvation is his gift to me (Ephesians 2:8-9).



Posted on July 4, 2008 at 11:48 pm


Comment by Anonymous (Comment ID: 415692)

Interesting information and well written. I would like to know more about the Society’s use of Johannes Greber spiritist translation, as well as disfellowshipping being considered a pagan custom. What sources or links can you refer to or did you use on the above 2 points, as I’d like to do more research? I have been df’d for 2 years, (was baptized and a witness for 16 years) and only became familiar with a lot of things AFTER I was ousted from the religion. Interesting how that works, isn’t it. But my eyes have been opened and I am more educated now than ever before with the real ‘truth’ of many things. Look forward to your reply in advance.



Posted on December 16, 2008 at 5:43 am

 
 

Comment by DrinyDiluer (Comment ID: 293359)

I’d prefer reading in my native language, because my knowledge of your languange is no so well. But it was interesting! Look for some my links:



Posted on January 2, 2008 at 10:31 pm

 

Comment by ABSENTIMENTAL (Comment ID: 161701)

ummm… Didn’t jesus eat and associate with tax collectors? would that mean that he was also a sinner? Jesus. a perfect man… sinning, by associating with and even eating dinner at a tax collectors home!?

and of the man that didn’t talk to his mother and she started going to meetings aain…. what of the cases where the mother commited suicide? I am sure there were some.. I would have felt so rejected if I were her!!

Family IS SUPPOSED TO BE IMPORTANT!

DF IS BS



Posted on February 5, 2007 at 10:04 am

 

Comment by dan (Comment ID: 123047)

OK, I have a question here. I left the JWs in 1996, but was never baptised. My mother is still a very active JW. Am I to assume that under these new stricter regulations, had I been baptised (which I came very close to doing), and then left, she would not be talking to me right now? As of right now, she and I speak on a regular basis, and she is very involved in my daughter’s life, or as involved as she can be with the miles between us.



Posted on January 2, 2007 at 4:42 am

 

Comment by D111115 (Comment ID: 86859)

I think disfellowshipping is only necessary because the whole religion is built on a house of cards. Let just one get jostled ever so slightly, and the whole thing comes down. This is what happens when you have a bunch of old fogeys that are isolated from younger groups that make the rules–and they are usually poorly integrated with each other and with reality.

A far better solution is independent thinking on the part of the members. If everyone were encouraged to think for themselves, problems would be solved with discussion. True, there would still be mistakes. But those who are affected would be able to fix them. And those who are bent on creating problems where none exist would be stopped from doing so by the administrators within the congregation, which should be their purpose. And a lot of the mysticism that the congregation of Jehovah’s Witnesses is known for would simply collapse. You would get a solid foundation that is workable.

There are still going to be attackers. However, someone who raises a specious argument about a sound organization is going to have a miserable time getting taken seriously. Eventually, they will either leave quietly or quit trying to disrupt things. Anyone with a minor disagreement would be able to fix the problem without derailing the whole organization. The organization would stand, because rational, independent thinking people are going to see right through garbage put out by envious, irrational troublemakers. Disfellowshipping would be very rare, and reserved for those who are trying to destroy the sould organization at any cost. In practice, maybe 1% of the flock would fit this category, if that.

As for “sin”, a “sin” should be defined as meaning an action that has negative consequences for the committer or for society. Sins that only affect the committer become their own punishment–for instance, if you smoke, you alone have to deal with the effects of your smoking. “Sins” like oral sex, masturbation, watching porn, or gambling (within reason) are not going to affect anyone in any detrimental way, and people doing these things should be left alone. They are not harming society in any way, so these should not be subjected to the investigations and hearings that usually precede judicial committees. Basically, most of the “sins” that should be judicial offenses are already criminal offenses and should be dealt with as such.



Posted on November 26, 2006 at 3:47 pm


Comment by sue (Comment ID: 344018)

correct me if im wrong but doesnt the bible say it is not for us to judge but for jehvah…….ex jw for 18yrs 16 when i got baptised for the wrong reasons everyone was so proud of me, the things you do for love to be able to go out with a felow baptised jw and for 6 wks later to be dumped , feeling low decided to not go anymore experience the world and got pregnant i did feel sorry for what i did but still didnt want to go t o meetings but got disfellowshipped anyway but i was repentant for the act.



Posted on August 17, 2008 at 2:16 am

 
 

Comment by Alessandra (Comment ID: 83209)

what happens with a person that is grown up as a JW is that everything he’s known to be true like the whole points of view this person has had falls apart, but it occours at the expenses of many loss and pain. I grew up as a JW and when it happened to me it was devastating. Even today i am not completely convinced on how it happened cause i never went to the comitee they invited me several times and after given period my uncle just came to me and comunicate that i was disassociated. So cruel and almost mean…my sin? i didn’t have one! they did what they wanted because i started working on tV, as an sign language interpreter, not even standind my point of view, only translating. Ok, my sin was to do a job that helped create congrations of Deaf to them… I loose everything and you cannot imagine how sad and emotionally destroyd I was then. But i decided not to give in to that feelings and it helped me to move on. Although I lost part of my family that would keep appearences to the ‘brothers’ I can say I am very happy today after not belonging to such a closed mind kind of organization. Deceive is what I feel, for the wts and for my family. As I am Brazilian I didn’t have many acess to this kind of website, but now after living abroad for a few, I had this opportunity to write and share my feelings with others that suffered like me. Today I am a very happy person and continue to teach and help other deaf people, including old bible students that have become my students or have to deal with me in work. Sometimes I even laugh at this situations. The TV network accepted to enlarge its works sign language orientaded and what can I say to JW and WTS? What a good sign language teacher and interpreter they’ve lost!!!
With love and kindness
Alessandra



Posted on November 16, 2006 at 12:12 pm


Comment by Markus (Comment ID: 83296)

Yep good buddy,
The JW’s will go to any lengths to keep their sheep
on the straight and narrow. Getting rid of a good interpreter like yourself, because you are starting to think more freely is normal for them.
When I think back on the times when I a was a staunch supporter of the cult, I almost feel sick, my life has improved in all aspects since I bade them farewell.
It takes time to shake the ideology out of the system,
and when one studies enough to realize there is no such thing as Armageddon, never was never will be,
you will feel marvelous.
Cheers,
Markus



Posted on November 16, 2006 at 5:42 pm

 
 

Comment by margy (Comment ID: 28683)

the first president charles taze russell was a sun god worhsiper.
he was into pyrimidology,the roots of the watchtower are of false teachings.
they have had neumerous false predictions of the end of the world.
their bible, the new world translation was written by people and not scholars.
they have changed the original christian bible, to fit their teachings, they have changed many scriptures, taken away and added to, so that their teachings would be false.
the BIble says, NOT to ADD to or to take AWAY from the scriptures, or this would be a sin!
they dont worship Jesus and the bible says that they worshiped Christ and the angels worshiped Christ.
Jesus said, I am the WAY the TRUTH and the LIFE!
without worshipping Christ, we dont even know the Father, the bible says that.
it says, ALL of the FULLNESS of God lies IN Christ!
when we accept Christ as Lord and Savior, he gives us the Holy Spirit.
eternal life is IN Christ!
the Bible says, whom the son sets FREE he is FREE indeed.
Jesus came to set us free from the old law covenant, we are not to be bound to sacrficing, the bible says that Jesus is the PERFECT sacrifice for our sins.
there is NO other, a organziation cannot give you eternal life, ONLY Christ can!
we can KNOW without a doubt that we have eternal life.
we dont have to work for our salvation, it is a FREE gift.
do jw’s know that they have eternal life?
they THINK that they have eternal life.
the bible does not teach doubt, it says that we can KNOW that we will be with the Lord when we leave this earth.
the bible says, absent from the body and PRESENT with the Lord.
the Lord is the same yesterday, today and forever and he says that he will NEVER leave us nor forsake us.
he never changes, if the rules of a organization are changing all the time, and prophecies are not coming true, i would say BEWARE, many come in my name saying that they are the true religion.
they are sheeps in wolves clothing.
we are not to look forward to armeggedon, the bible says that, it says to be BEWARE of people that are looking for the end.
the greatest commandment from the Lord was to LOVE unconditionally, as he did.
we are to teach the good news of salvation, Jesus said, to take up our cross and to follow HIM!
not a orgazniztion!
he said to cast our burdens on HIM (Jesus) and he will sustain us and remove our transgressions from us.
and he remembers them NO more!
when the jw’s disfellowship, they tear families apart, they dont keep them together, they dont show unconditional love.
we owe our lives to Jesus and not to anyone else, we answer to Christ and not to a org!
Jesus is the mediator, we need to quit trying to play God and start loving people!!
what do the jw’s do with the commandment that says, to love and honor your parents?
they throw love right out the window!
i see emotional abuse galore!!
i pray that the Lord will show them and others that all the glory and honor goes to CHrist, the one who died that shameful death on the cross for our sins.
the bible says that we should boast ONLY of what Christ has done for us.
he is our redeemer, Savior and eternal Father.
the alpha and the omega and the begining and the end.
Jesus said, I AM THAT I AM, I AM BEFORE ABRAHAM.
he is EMANUEL, God is with us!
the Bible says, there is NO other name under heaven and earth that man can be saved!
his name is JESUS!
the bible says, now there is therefore, NO CONDEMNATION to those who are IN Christ Jesus!
PRAISE GOD!! HE is the answer for us all!



Posted on July 22, 2006 at 6:16 pm

 

Comment by Michael (Comment ID: 18796)

I spent a great deal of time trying to figure out who too address in this e-mail. I was Df’d in 1981 for apostacy..in other words, daring to question the doctrinal authority of the GB. My family has been involved with the society in some form since the late 1890’s through my great grandfather. We lived and “served” in the Bronx, and Brooklyn NY. When I was “removed” from the congregation, like everyone, before and after me, I created for myself great vexation. To this day most of my family members who are still JW’s refuse to speak to me..At the end of the day, after 25 years, I have finally purged them from the depths of my soul. I have no love, no pity or compassion for their ignorance, or hypocrisy, nor do I feel the need to tell them the “real truth”. I will be quite content to see them die in thier own ignorance. Truth is truth, it is revealed to those who are seeking it in truth, and needs no qualification. We all, everyone of us can choose to leave or to stay. We all know the consequences of either of those decisions. I, like many others made the hard decision to leave, and suffered, the consequences of that decision.. frankly, it was the only truthful decision “one” could make. I have no regrets, or remorse. My decision has enriched my life in ways every JW could never even imagine. I would encourage anyone who is caught in a struggle of whether to leave or stay..to be truthful to yourself…The Spirit of truth is watching..!!!



Posted on June 15, 2006 at 2:39 am

 

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