Father shunned by family for defying faith to save
child
Carol Harrington
CANADIAN PRESS
Mar. 11, 2002
CALGARY — Shunned by the Jehovah's Witnesses
he once embraced, he's a now lonely man, ignored by family and friends
as if he were a wanderingghost.
He's been "lost" for almost a month, since defying
his faith by agreeing to blood transfusions for his 16-year-old
leukemia-stricken daughter.
The 51-year-old Calgary father, who cannot be named under laws
protecting her identity, knew he would pay a high price. Even the
girl whose life might be saved by his decision sometimes says she
hates him.
"I was under tremendous pressure," he said in a recent
interview. "Because I knew that if I went against what the
church taught, that I would be excommunicated and no Jehovah's Witness
would ever speak to me again, including my family."
His wife now comes home only to do laundry. His other two daughters,
14 and 22, want little to do with him.
They have banned him from his daughter's hospital room when Witness
meetings are piped in over the speaker phone. Meetings occur several
times a week and some last all day.
He goes to work at an architectural firm but is ignored by friends.
"It's as though I don't exist."
Any Jehovah's Witness who challenges such tenets as that against
blood transfusions, which they believe is set out in several Bible
passages, is shunned.
"When I made the decision with a clear conscience, I went
into my daughter's hospital room. My whole family was there, and
I told them about my decision, saying: `No matter what happens with
this case, I still love you, each and every one of you.'
"And their reply, each of them, was: `We hate you and we'll
never speak to you again'."
Doctors say the best available treatment to combat the potentially
fatal disease is blood transfusions and chemotherapy. His daughter
has received those treatments several times over at Alberta Children's
Hospital.
According to the girl's lawyer, when she is taken to the operating
room for a transfusion, she uses what little strength she has to
resist.
"They semi-sedate her, hold her down on the bed and they give
the blood transfusion," said David Gnam, whose Ontario law
firm in Georgetown, works primarily for the Jehovah's Witnesses.
"She's not trying to die. She would like treatment that would
respect her wishes."
In mid-February, she was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia
after going to hospital for what she thought was a throat infection.
A pediatrician told the family that there is a 40 per cent to 50
per cent survival rate with blood transfusions and a 65 per cent
chance with a bone marrow transplant. They rejected the suggested
treatment, saying they were Jehovah's Witnesses.
Then the father reopened his Bible to Acts 15:28, a passage Witnesses
cite for refusing blood transfusions. Over and over, he read:
"For the Holy Spirit and we ourselves, ask a favour adding
no further burden to you except these necessary things: to abstain
from things sacrificed to idols and from blood and from the things
strangled and from fornication. If you carefully keep yourselves
from these things, you will prosper. Good health to you."
The words he had read hundreds of times since becoming a Witness
20 years ago in Ontario in Belleville and accepted: no heavenly
paradise for those who accept another's blood.
"I was struggling with those scriptures and reading others
that talk a great deal about the sanctity of life, how important
life is."
Finally, he concluded it would be wrong, even cruel, to watch his
daughter die without trying to save her.
Had she agreed to transfusion, she too would be disowned by her
mother and sisters. "She's lived such an isolated, controlled
life — all her friends are Jehovah's Witnesses."
He talks to his daughter each day by phone. Sometimes she gets
angry, telling him: "I hate you."
Then there are kinder, gentler moments when she says the opposite.
© Copyright 2002 Calgary
Heral
Continuing story:
Teen's transfusions must continue: Court
The Alberta Court of Appeal ruled that a young Jehovah's Witness
from Calgary will have to continue getting blood transfusions. The
16-year-old girl, who suffers from leukemia, is not mature enough
to make a decision that's crucial to her treatment, the high court
said in upholding earlier rulings by lower courts.
(added 04/27/2002)
Dying teen leaves Canada for treatment
The father of a teenaged leukemia patient who fought against blood
transfusions for religious reasons is upset that his wife has taken
their daughter out of the country to a secret location where she'll
begin alternative treatments.
(added 07/22/2002)
Jehovah's Witness teen happy to be 17 years old
A Canadian girl is undergoing alternative chemotherapy treatment
at an undisclosed location in North America. She made headlines
earlier this year when she refused to receive blood transfusions.
Her battle has torn her family apart. Her parents are now embroiled
in divorce proceedings, split over Mia's refusal to undergo blood
transfusions. (added 08/21/2002)
Dad of Alberta girl who fought transfusions
lashes out at Jehovah's Witnesses The grieving father of a 17-year-old
Jehovah's Witness girl who died of leukemia says he intends to sue
the religious group, claiming it destroyed his family and caused
his daughter to fight against blood transfusions. (updated 09/07/2002)
Irreconcilable beliefs shattered family
-Parents’ clash over transfusions led to divorce A bitter
clash between religious beliefs and medical treatment led to the
ultimate breakup and bankruptcy of a Calgary family, a judge has
concluded in the parents’ divorce action. (added 11/20/2003)
Previous story:
Judge orders teen continue transfusions Lawyers for a 16-year-old
girl, and her mother requested a stay preventing doctors from administering
transfusions against her will. But the judge ordered a transfusion.
The girl's father is also a Jehovah's Witness, but after reviewing
Scriptures now believes there's nothing wrong with blood transfusions
and favours the treatments to keep his daughter alive (added 02/22/2002).
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